A self-confessed chatterbox in an more and more loud world, Angela Garwood swapped dialog for stillness at a device-free silent retreat, hoping to find what lies beneath the noise
“It’s okay,” a fellow bather mouths with a reassuring smile. I squeal barely because the water hits my waist earlier than plunging in. It’s excellent. Refreshing with out the standard razor-sharp iciness of British waters. I emerge feeling woke up and alive.
A bunch of us bob round, admiring the gorgeous white chalk cliffs of the Seven Sisters. Others sit on the shore. Nobody talks, as this is able to be breaking the principles. It’s a wonderful Sunday morning and I haven’t spoken for over 36 hours.
I’ve come to the Sussex coast to spend the weekend attempting one thing I wrestle with at instances: protecting my mouth shut. As a performer, the notion of a silent retreat goes towards a lot of what brings me pleasure: utilizing my voice and a love of phrases. I’m a talker. I enjoy a witty change or an outrageous story.
Doubts apart, I’d arrived at Gayles, a gorgeous transformed household farm in Eastbourne, on a Friday afternoon, within the midst of a very full-on summer season. Hoping to search out stillness amid the chaos, I’d opted for one thing extra radical than a spa day.
“It’s important,” says Roz Robinson, 66, yoga instructor, former psychotherapist and host of the Strolling, Yoga, Meditation, Silence retreats at Gayles. “You wouldn’t count on to drive your automobile for a yr with out having an MOT, and I don’t suppose we ought to be allowed to hold on with out having, in case you like, our personal reset.”
“It’s such a valuable area to have the ability to step into,” she continues. “To present your self time to mirror, as a result of there may be a lot noise within the exterior world now.”
I’m proven to my room, a spacious double with views of the ocean in a transformed Thirties steady. Then the group, all 18 of us, most of them ladies, are given a tour of the grounds, which embody a pool, tennis courts and cosy corners for quiet contemplation. Surrounded by 11 acres of rolling downland, there’s a comforting and unassuming family-home really feel to Gayles, which has been in Robinson’s household for generations.
Demand for restorative escapes is surging post-Covid. Picture: Laurie Griffiths
Poolside, Robinson requests “no bombing”. “Who bombs on a silent retreat?!” we ask. “Oh, it’s occurred…”. We chuckle. Different guidelines embody no alcohol, no Apple Watches – it’s device-free – and no aggressively robust fragrance or deodorant in case you’re sharing a room. Electrical toothbrushes are allowed, however I later chorus from utilizing my hairdryer.
A small wicker basket sits on a facet desk with a word inviting us handy our telephones in. It’s not obligatory, however we’re inspired to take action. I place mine on the pile.
We’re, for the preliminary meal, allowed to speak. Munching on our scrumptious, home-grown vegetable lasagne, I get pleasure from attending to know my soon-to-be-mute companions. We’re principally first-timers and ages vary from thirty-something to sixty-something.
“I stroll away from right here like I’m strolling on air,” says Fiona Lomas, 54, a Brighton-based inventive director on her tenth keep at Gayles.
Having the burden of small discuss eliminated was refreshingly liberating. Meals got here alive
After dinner, we head to the cow shed, a tranquil yoga area transformed from the unique farm constructing. Candles are lit and I really feel a child-like sense of ease, like I’m being taken care of. We every share why we’ve come.
The explanations adopted comparable themes: needing to change off, desirous to strive one thing new and looking for a reference to nature. One younger skilled in sustainability finance admitted “I’m not all that snug with silence.” A lady in her sixties simply mentioned: “I’m right here…for me”.
I’m not alone in my want for stillness. After taking a 68% hit in 2020, wellness tourism within the UK grew at an annual price of 79% between 2020 and 2022, based on the International Wellness Institute, greater than twice the worldwide common of 36%. The institute’s 2026 wellness tourism tendencies embody “The Nervous System Reset” and “In Search of Deep Relaxation”, reflecting rising demand for restorative escapes, nature and time away from digital overload. Condé Nast Traveller, in the meantime, named ‘silent journey’ one in every of its high journey tendencies for 2024.
Silent walks are ‘a very completely different method of experiencing nature,’ says visitor Fiona Lomas. Picture: Laurie Griffiths
“Should you want something, I’m all the time right here,” assures Robinson. “If it’s essential to cry, or scream even, you’ll be able to scream. Crying is a launch. It doesn’t matter!”. There’s discuss of resetting our autonomic nervous system, getting nearer to our true selves, and therapeutic. Whereas the retreat isn’t spiritual, there’s a religious undercurrent.
We’re led by a rest train, earlier than a momentous but refined declaration: “The silence has begun”. I go away the room elated by the problem. An area opens up in my thoughts.
“I like that there’s no strain to make dialog,” says Rebecca Hastings, 46, a global charity fundraiser. “I come for that deep high quality of silence that occurs in group, when persons are collectively”.
We rapidly discovered our circulate as a bunch. Within the kitchen the next morning, we dance round one another, ready to stack the dishwasher or boil water, as if beforehand choreographed. Occasional smiles are exchanged, however interplay is minimal. I get pleasure from a smoothie earlier than we embark on a five-mile sunny coastal stroll.
Within the silence, I used to be confronted, head-on, with my ideas, which was unnerving but empowering
“You’ll have some garbage to work by,” says Robinson. Certainly. Whereas my ideas have been louder than ever, so too was the aliveness of the character surrounding me. I discovered the sample of bushes mesmerising and seen when a flock of tweeting birds flew overhead. I felt held within the presence of everybody else and over time, a harmonious group synchronicity turned obvious. We moved virtually as one, stopping collectively and turning away each time somebody left the road for a bush wee.
“The walks are all the time actually attention-grabbing since you simply see and listen to issues that you simply wouldn’t usually,” says Lomas. “It’s a very completely different method of experiencing nature.”
We’re inspired to relaxation, so I take pleasure in a two-hour nap, adopted by some tea and cake. Yoga and meditation, which I’d grown keen on by this level, got here later, then a brief invitation to interrupt the silence and share how we have been discovering the expertise. Most stayed quiet, myself included.
The silence ends shortly earlier than lunch on Sunday and I’ve combined emotions. I used to be having fun with our peaceable cocoon, however welcomed attending to know the others.
“It’s wonderful how related you’ll be able to really feel to a bunch of individuals, even once you’re not speaking,” I mentioned in our remaining circle. We’d shared a singular expertise and I’d miss their acquainted faces. Collectively, we’d created our personal silent bubble, and I’d come to understand present inside it. It was, as Robinson described, a ‘heat silence’.
‘We consider silence as being empty, however I learnt there’s a richness to that area,’ says author Angela Garwood. Picture: Derry Robinson
“At our supply, we’re quiet, loving, joyous communicative beings,” she displays. “Donkeys standing in a area are all related, they’re not chatting on a regular basis.”
Having the burden of small discuss eliminated was refreshingly liberating. Meals got here alive. There’s a depth of stillness that’s arduous to succeed in once you’re always making dialog.
We consider silence as being empty, a void that wants filling, however I learnt there’s a richness to that area. A palpable, but peaceable vitality that sits inside us, all the time. Within the silence, I used to be confronted, head-on, with my ideas, which was unnerving but empowering.
It wasn’t straightforward. Big life uncertainties surfaced, together with massive questions I had no rapid solutions to. I seen all the pieces: my thoughts drifting from the previous to the longer term, or just being unduly self-critical. I felt rigidity in my physique as I moved between yoga poses. There have been moments I briefly broke the silence, alone in my room, to offer myself the odd pep discuss or cry. I surrendered to no matter got here up.
The silence created area to listen to what I already knew deep down. I wanted to return up for air amidst my frantic life; to cease, and breathe.
“We search for solutions on the market, when actually the solutions are in right here,” says Robinson in her closing lesson. “Be form to yourselves, each one in every of you.”
I left Gayles reenergised, decided to construct stillness into my days and decide to the follow. One breath at a time.
Predominant picture: Laurie Griffiths
