The lesson I’ve to continue learning on this lifetime is that I’m accountable for creating my very own pleasure, even when life is throwing irritating and anxiety-inducing issues at me.
This previous yr has dealt me Tower card after Tower card: a breakup, transferring to a brand new state the place I do know nobody however my dad and mom, ongoing tax points, the demise of my grandma, a well being scare, plus my fixed companions – persistent again ache and a scarcity of readability in my mind.
Grieving, confusion, anxiousness, loneliness; I’ve felt all of it with out a lot house for air this yr.
I hold ready for all of it to thaw out. I ask the massive, large universe to put in writing me into a brand new chapter, to make me really feel like a complete human being, to convey me the enjoyment that I do know I (and everybody else) deserve.
However simply once I assume I can lastly relaxation, one other drawback hits. I’m wondering what karmic debt I have to repay on this lifetime. Am I being punished ultimately? Or am I only a human being experiencing loads suddenly?
The factor is that if I sit round ready for the second that life lastly feels excellent, I’ll consistently miss alternatives to expertise pleasure, laughter, connection, and pleasure.
On the times once I discover myself saying, “I’ll lastly be pleased when this chapter of my life closes“, I do know as an alternative that I would like to hunt out small methods to expertise pleasure.
And I’ve to supply it for myself as an alternative of ready for another person to present it to me. The longer I await others to supply me my goals on a silver platter, the longer I deny myself my goals.
So what’s pleasure? What’s happiness?
It may be the smallest factor.
I take into consideration what meals, music, actions, motion pictures, locations, scents, and colours I’m drawn to.
I ask what makes me really feel good.
After which I see if I can expertise any of these issues immediately.
The factor about me is that I’m persistent. I’m keen to combat (albeit in a peaceable approach) when challenges come my approach.
Typically I hate how isolating this human expertise is, but I nonetheless wish to expertise it.
And that’s the reason I’ve to search out the enjoyment that I can, at any time when I can, as a result of I don’t need my days, my persona, and my life to be characterised by wishing issues have been totally different.
The lesson I’ve to continue learning is that I can not wait till life is ideal to really feel worthy of experiencing pleasure.
As a substitute, I need to proceed exhibiting up and creating that pleasure for myself.
